Meet Dr. F., who treated me so well for over three years was a goal dating back to late 2009. At times throughout this year, I thought that I never go there. "
Yet it happened: What a pleasure! I foresaw our meeting in an office rather than in the corridors. (But that's for the next meeting). Returning, at home after our impromptu meeting, I was all fire and flame, compared to the possibility of another treatment (protocol research), perhaps an extension of life. So I expressed on my blog so colorful, a little exuberant.
I realized that the stakes were quite specific, issues of life and death, the fundamental issues and it is important not to close the debate from a side or another to make an informed decision. It is open to anything that can think, he should talk about and we must allow time and space to think about all that. There is nobody who can make the decision for me and assume that decision. We would like to make a decision without too have consequences.
Today, a few days later, the state of my thinking seems more mixed, tempered, and I'm in a period of blur.
for treatment, it will take at least one scanner, examinations, that is to say abandon the choice I made not to see the progress of my illness to avoid disappointment and anguish.
These treatments, it is a comfort zone that I am asked to leave.
I could see this as a new research project, I have little right now, but a risky project. Is this the kind of project that I like?
The result will he live up to my expectations, not only will I lose my capacity present life, pain control, continue home care?
avoid complications that may endanger myself.
avoid complications that may endanger myself.
Have proper medical supervision, to flee the effort and stress. Will I be affected by a scanner that I decided to do more? Currently I do not know anything and I live very well with. If I'm told you can not do the treatment, is it not likely to plunge me into despair?
The wisest course is to wait until the 25th, listen to the proposal, think again, tread carefully, always keep a space for reflection, the right to stop if I feel it does not suit me in my feelings .. If this adventure, I lose my ability to create, learn, write, then nature is likely to make his work faster.
Embarking on a new adventure, complex and challenging for the 5th time, whereas my current quality of life brings me a perfectly acceptable, brings questions, which are currently unanswered.
"The best is the enemy of good, "I always said the old Eric.
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